Beloved Master,
For some unknown reason I had been putting off doing Discipline One for the longest time until last weekend when I forced myself to do it. And I say forced because the first few chapters really were I am ashamed to say, torture. I do not understand why I resisted this so. I loved your lectures and all the missing pieces fell into place, but the questions I initially met with great resentment. I did not want to investigate into my past as I felt I had dropped it already, I think. Why was this so? It cannot be that I don't want to change as I found you because i saw the need for a great change in me and I welcome all the changes being with you has resulted in me. Is it ego? But even then I have welcomed everything you have said to me because I know that it only serves to help me shed and bloom and if my ego stands in the way then please, I beg of you, help me tear it down.
But then the last few chapters suddenly were like my inner windows being flung open and I could not stop until I finished. The effect on me and the Mastery Meditation only for two days has been profound, I felt an amazing surge of power, so why did I struggle with it so? Am I missing something that I yet have to do to work on myself Master? And also how do I live it? For example, when I am judging someone and being aware of it or acknowledging that I am irritated or angry with a situation and being aware of it and stopping the emotion from coming to me, what then do I do? How do I create in the gap that I am now so mindful of? Thank you again beloved Master, being with you I feel like Alice in Wonderland after drinking the first potion, I just feel myself growing larger and larger.
At your feet Master
Posted by: Ma Prem Bodhi@ Sharlini Category: Mastery Dialogues: 2
Thank you so much Master, I am glad I am on the right track. I will keep at it then, at your feet with much love.
Posted by: Ma Prem Bodhi@ Sharlini